Go Greyhound

I'm trying to plan a trip to Florida in February and I hate to fly. I'm going so far south that driving it in one day isn't feasible. Driving it in two days sucks too much time out of my week of vacation. In desperation, I decided to check out my options at Greyhound. 

They are bad.

However, I found this interesting info about checked baggage. I think it’s safe to say that Greyhound caters to a different audience than the airlines. The red highlights are mine.

Acceptable Types of Baggage

In general, acceptable baggage includes suitcases, duffel bags, toolboxes, trunks and securely tied cardboard boxes. A plastic and/or a paper bag is not acceptable as checked baggage.

Really? What if the bag has handles? And what if I securely tie those handles together? That, my friend, turns my JC Penney shopping bag into luggage.


Prohibited Items for Checked Baggage 

Acids, ammunition, animals, combustible liquids, compressed gases, corpses, cremated remains, explosives, firearms of all types, fireworks, flammable liquids, furniture, hazardous materials (poisons, radioactive materials, etc.), materials with a disagreeable odor, matches, merchandise for resale, protruding articles, or any unsecured articles including those in plastic or paper bags are prohibited

All right, I get it, no plastic or paper bags no matter how nice they are. But wait a minute. I can’t check a corpse? What if it’s in a securely tied cardboard box?

Hmm, no cremated remains either. So much for Plan B.