More Fun With Customer Comments

This comment starts out pretty well…but it’s like her meds wore off right in the middle of typing it.

BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS HAVING TROUBLE FINDIN BRAS UR PLACE IS AND HAS BEEN THE ONLY PLACE WHERE I CAN FIND WHAT I NEED BUT I THINK I NEED Q BEETER FIT I WEAR 36DDD FIT VERY WELL ON MY BACK I HAVE NO PLUNGES OVER THE BACK OR THE SIDE BUT MY CHEST SEEM TO POP OUT A LITTLE.

Thank god she has no plunges over the back. Those can be a bitch.

Insurance Rant

This is an excerpt from an article I just read on usatoday.com:

Outgoing Aetna chairman gets a $68.7 million goodbye

Ron Williams had a great final year at Aetna. The outgoing chairman of the nation’s third-biggest health insurer exercised stock options worth more than $50.3 million and pulled in $18.4 million in pay, stock and other compensation, according to the company’s 2011 proxy filing. Williams’ $68.7 million payout ranks among the highest of any 2010 compensation package.

Here's a link to the entire article if you want to read it:
www.usatoday.com/money

Now, I'm not a math whiz, but I can take $68.7 million and divide it by 365 days. Let's give Ron the benefit of the doubt and say that a high-level exec like him works every day of the year. His daily compensation?

$18,821. A day.

I have Aetna medical insurance through work. I don't know what the company pays, but my contribution is roughly $1300 annually, and that's after I get a discount for not smoking and being fairly healthy. If Ron works a 12 hour day, he could pay my portion of the coverage for a full year with one hour's work.

Now tell me again that our health care system isn't broken.

Flimpsy Bra

In January, I published an email my employer received from an upset customer about a sweater. At the time, I didn't realize it was the first of a series.

Following is a real, unedited email we received about a bra. I only deleted our company name and the contact information so I can keep my job.

To M, it's author, the only thing I can say is just be thankful your bra didn't get all link ball.

"I hav been a faithful shopper of (company) in bra and jeans but very faithful n my bra only buy them here for the last15yrs hav started my daughter,however for the last yr and last week just purchase a bra always buy (company)i notice the quality of my bra is not good at all i pay good money for these bras from 38-42.00 for my bras every trip sometimes 2 or 3 at a time on sat bought a(company)went for a black didnt hav one but need a bra so i boihht abrown one1st disapointment, 2days later it slidind and flimpsy, very disatified, didnt want to take bac cause i wore it, butpls do sumtin my daughyer and friend has already tried somewher elsei feel bad after i bragged on these underwire bras, wat to do now, i stuck wit a bra that not workin time after time i feel like i invested in a bad deal for the last yr and last week, my contact if u even care is(deleted)well thanks anyway....m"

Happy Birthday Joey

30 years ago today my son Joey was born. 30 years. I know, I was quite young to have a child. Nevertheless, I've found myself thinking about those early days with my first born, and one of my favorite stories ever.

My labor started on St. Patrick's Day. When it had progressed enough to head to the hospital, Joe (Joey’s dad) and I called to tell our parents. When Joe pulled the car into the circular drive of OSU Hospital to drop me off, we saw his parents waiting inside. They had beaten us there.

As it turned out, there wasn’t any hurry. I was in labor a long time. Joe and I, his parents and my parents ended up spending the night in the hospital, waiting for Joey. Joe and I walked the halls. The Gioffres and the Kolks played euchre in the waiting room. Everyone was tired and punchy.

Finally I was scheduled for a c-section and Joey was born. Joe went to the waiting room to tell our parents. This was back in the day before detailed untrasounds so Joe got to make the big announcement:
“It’s a boy…and he has the biggest balls I’ve ever seen.”

Always an interesting guy, that Joe.

But my mom fired right back: “Oh, he must take after the Kolks.”
She was a funny, funny woman.

That was March 18, 1981. The day we all met the sweet baby boy who was and is one of the best things that ever happened to me. Happy birthday, Joey!

On the Birthday of Dr. Suess

I’ve loved Dr. Suess
from the very first time
I heard read aloud
his merry-ful rhymes
of the cat in the hat
and Bartholomew too
of oobleck and Yertle
and fish red and blue.

I’ve loved Dr. Suess
and I’ll sing out his praises
for Horton and Grinch
and the fun that he raises.
If I ran the circus
or I ran the zoo
I couldn’t do better
than Suess, could you?

I’ve loved Dr. Suess
I’ve loved him a lot
and some of his books
were the first that I got,
like Fox In Sox and
Hop on Pop,
I read and I read and
I never have stopped.

(I meant what I said and I said what I meant,
I’m Dr. Suess faithful one hundred percent)

Reality Bites

When you think you’ve dodged a bullet
Or gotten a free pass,
Reality taps you on the shoulder
Then bites you in the ass.

Kentosh

One of the great things about working in advertising is the fun, creative people you get to work with every day. I’ve met many remarkable writers and designers over the years. Some of the relationships ended when the job ended, some of them became dear friends.

My buddy Kentosh fell somewhere in the middle. I found out yesterday that she died.

I loved Kentosh, but we weren’t in each other’s inner circle of friends. I met her when I was in my twenties. When that job ended, we were only sporadically in touch. Happily, in the last ten years or so, new jobs, email and Facebook reconnected us. We’d do lunch or an occasional weekend get-together.

The last month or so, I noticed Kentosh wasn’t posting on Facebook. I wondered why. Her obituary in Sunday’s paper offered the explanation. She had suffered a series of strokes, starting after Christmas. I didn’t even know she’d been sick.

So Kentosh is on my mind and since I tend to write about things that are on my mind, here we are.

Her name was Karen Kentosh. All of us who worked with her back in the day called her Kentosh. I don’t know why.

Kentosh was a talented, meticulous writer and also a charming cartoonist. Her little drawings and characters always made me smile. We called her Kentosh, but I know her nickname among other friends was Toons.

Kentosh and I, along with a couple other co-workers, were founding members of an elite social group called the Hell Hogs. Hell Hog meetings convened at lunch or happy hour. This may surprise you, but the Hell Hogs were not always well behaved. We took extended lunches. We sometimes drank at lunch. We lied about birthdays so we could get free dessert. We were loud. We thought we were hysterically funny but in reality we were probably obnoxious. It was so much fun and I still have my Hell Hog badge.

In the early days, Kentosh and I decided we should quit the advertising biz and open our own bar: Tosh & Gioff’s. Sadly, plans never progressed beyond the name.

Kentosh was about ten years older than I. When we first met, I thought she was the coolest person ever. Funny. Irreverent. Daring.

As we matured, I began to also appreciate her intelligence, her passion for politics and the environment, and her compassion for others.

This past September, Kentosh, two other Hell Hogs and I tried to organize a mini reunion. It didn’t happen, and that's a shame. It would have been great to hang with Kentosh one more time.


Kentosh Self Portrait